Hard to Get

Okay I am going to give advice on how to deal with it at the bottom of this page, but if you care to read me story (in red)...here it is:

*Well a friend and I were talking about boys that play hard to get. I was telling her that the current boy I am interested in, seems to be playing hard to get, and I wasn't quite sure how to deal with it. Personally, I am extremely confident with my ability to communicate/flirt with boys. I have never had problems with guys not liking me or flirting with me...then along came "Fred" (not his real name, but let's just roll with it!)

I met "Fred" at work. He and i immediately connected with each other on some levels. . . he was a bit more of the nerdy type, but by NO MEANS socially awkward or insecure. I was attracted to his personality a lot! His confidence/ability to carry a conversation, is not something that you find to often in guys. He also was quite the gentleman (again chivalry is not common nowadays...BUT IT SHOULD BE!)...and he may or may not be REALLY cute........sooooo, I cant deny the fact that i just kind of had an immediate crush on him...

Well, it was the last day of work, and we talked for a couple hours and he was definitely flirting. . . (NO DOUBT). But when it came time to say goodbye until next summer, he gave me a fantastic hug...but did not ask for my number or Facebook or anything... I was a bit, well, shocked... I just kind of looked at him thinking "are you kidding me?"
 So, me, being the confident girl that i am, said "well maybe I'll see you around...do you have Facebook or anything to keep in touch?" and he STILL didn't take the hint like, OH GEE MAYBE SHE WANTS MY NUMBER...hmmm...ya think?! but he gave me his last name at least. when i got home, i added him. and he obviously accepted and all that. well I messaged him joking around,  i said something witty, I just cant remember what, and when i said i had to go, he STILL did not ask for my number, so finally i just said screw it...and FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE. i gave him my number without him asking for it... i just said "here is my number, cause honestly the chat bar on fb kind of drives me insane" (which is not a lie, im not a huge fan of fb chat)...WELL he immediately texted me WHICH i thought was a good sign. 

The first day of texting, he was flirty. he asked me to play the questions game, asked me relationship related questions. we talked about our exes, i told him about my crazy physio "i want to marry you" type ex. and we both were honest with each other on how indecisive we are when it comes to relationships. Then he went to bed. the next day i didn't hear from him...or the day after that, so finally i just texted him "hey whats up" and invited him to some party. he said he had college or else he would love to go...well i kept asking him to hang out for a couple days after...to no avail.  

FINALLY he said he might be able to hang out on a Friday night...and when that Friday rolled around i texted him asking if we were still hanging out... and he said sure. We went to the park and went for a long drive...then we just sat in his car talking and listening to music. 

*Guys, I'm falling for this guy...He's pretty freaking fantastic..just saying.*

Well he was definitely flirting and showed signs of interest when we hung out ...then he just didnt show signs of interest when we were talking the next day...and when i tried to kind of be obvious that i had a crush on him...he kind of, blew me off to an extent. 
I am by NO MEANS desperate. so yesterday this is the exact texts that were sent between us:

me: "Can I ask you a question? Like straight up?"
him: "Yes, anything! :)"
me: "do you want me to like leave you alone? Because I'm actually making an effort to get to know you, but you dont really seem thrilled. so just tell me straight up, you know? Cause you're honestly really hard to read..."
him: "NO dont leave me alone!!! I'm just not a huge fan of texting. Think of how i acted Friday night, that's how i truly feel!"
me: "Well thats why im confused, cause you acted a lot different then you respond haha"
him: "I know...but how i ACT is how i feel"
me: "All im saying is, the last thing i want to do is bother you, so im just telling you, always be straight up with me"
him: "Oh i will...but i do enjoy a bit of mystery"
me: "oh me too! but not he mystery of "does he dislike me?" hah, not a fun type of mystery TRUST ME ;)"
him: "I think it gives some urgency and gives eachother a reason to pursue and impress..."
me: "well for girls like me, it makes me leave people alone and move on..but hey, that's why i asked you, because i wanted to know your stance on things"
him: "you'll find out sooner or later :) goodnight!"

TALK ABOUT PLAYING HARD TO GET...

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Alright HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS:

1. keep yourself occupied...obsessing over it, will just make you start imagining up concepts about him disliking you...

2. Call him on it, make him realize that hard to get is okay, but hes not to good for you

3. make sure your relationship and communication is not all SMS...boys who play hard to get ACT differently than they type. (usually the odds are in your favor haha)

4. Play a bit of hard to get back... Two can play at his little game..don't text him for a few days, don't respond instantly...etc.

5. DON'T talk about all the boys you could get...I've tried that once with a hard to get guy...basically had the attitude: Oh your hard to get, whatever a lot of guys want to GET me...Not something that's a good idea, cause he started doing it back to me, and it made me feel crappy. haha for the record, he and i have been best friends for 4 years, and we've kissed and stuff and just decided we are better JUST friends...so its not like he and i didn't work out because of that... just it didn't feel good reciprocated

6. Play his game a little bit...he wants to see how serious you are about wanting him, well show him that a little fight isnt going to turn you away. :) he wants to feel sought after, so you should do that, but just keep the sought"ing" to a cute level and the level he wants it at--not stalker sought"ing" ;)

May the odds be ever in your favor! goodluck, and goodbye!